Tuesday, August 24, 2004

60 Annoyances

41. People ashing into slot machine change buckets

42. DVDs that claim bullshit standard items as "Special Features"

43. Abbreviating “address” to “addy” and “tournament” to “tourney”

44. When you ask what day it is, just a few minutes after midnight, and smart asses give you the technically correct answer.

45. Mormons

46. Mexico

47. The "I'm a bad ass" look on fake IDs

48. A clumpy pack of Sweet n' Low in a humid environment

49. Animals that have longer lifespans than humans

50. The fact that Scott Bakula never Quantum Leaped to the 90s (and the 80s hardly ever) even though according to the conceit of the show, he was supposed to be leaping around randomly between 1952 and 1999. Think about it: the show aired in the 80s. He could have leapt to the 90s… which would have been the past for him, but the future for us… That’s sci-fi gold!

51. People who don’t seem to mind walking barefoot on dirty city pavement.

52. A 16 year old sportin' a mustache

53. Jeopardy questions that really have nothing to do with the category. (like if the category was poetry: This city, Vermont's capital, was said to have inspired Robert Frost")

54. Tobacco chewers who spit into clear containers

55. That uncookable mucousy part of the egg

56. Gift certificates that expire

57. The way old people's heads can just bob around

58. People who could have that huge, disgusting, hair-sprouting mole or growth removed from their face anytime they want in a quick, inexpensive, painless trip to the dermatologist, yet don’t.

59. When the HDTV widescreen-TV owners deliberately stretch out the square-TV broadcast to fill the whole screen. Doesn't that run counter to the image you're desperately trying to project of caring so very deeply about picture quality?

60. Novelizations of movies that are themselves based on books (e.g. The novilzation of the Robert de Niro Frankenstein and also Francis Ford Coppola’s Bram Stokers’ Dracula).

Here's a funny parody of that last trend: http://www.revolutionsf.com/article.html?id=838

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