Sunday, December 04, 2005

140 Annoyances

121. A weak dribble coming out of the water fountain.

122. The gratuitous, pointless, just-cause-we-can cussing that permeates every HBO show.

123. The Nokia Ringtone

124. Giving apples on Halloween.

125. Tee shirts boasting about superbowls from four years ago.

126. Unwanted Pavlovian responses - like when I take the occasional nighttime shower and it leaves me unable to sleep, or when I hear a song I normally listen to at the gym and it causes my heartbeat to accelerate.

127. That "Jumpin' Jive'n!" song. For the love of God, swing dance music, GET A SECOND SONG.

128. People who insist on their full first name.

129. Daylight Savings Time

130. The ability of wires and cords, all by themselves, to get tangled in knots of rubik's-cube complexity.

131. Dreams where I just can't find a bathroom.

132. The way that 9/11 is constantly cited, even years later, in corporate annual reports, in any industry, to explain virtually any financial shortcoming.

133. Dr. T and the Women

134. Lawn sprinklers in the pouring rain.

135. Airport security always "recommends" that I remove my shoes. When I choose not to, then they insist. So it wasn't really a recommendation. It was a requirement. Tell you what, let's make a deal. I'll remove my shoes, and you level with me up front and not treat me like a fucking five year old.

136. When you answer the phone and the other person says "Hi! Who is this?"

137. Menus that let me know that a certain entree "goes great with a Bud Light!"

138. How come whenever videogame playing is portayed on TV or in film, the player is always spasming violently with the controller, bashing buttons at high speeds and jerking their arms around?

139. Sucking a lemon seed up the straw and swallowing it.

140. Was it me or was Tracey Ullman never funny, ever? Not even for a second. Not once. Not for one moment over like 3 different shows, spanning deacdes? Never. Just not ever, ever funny.


Anonymous said...

Dr. T and the Women?

Rowsdower said...

If you watched it you'd be annoyed too.